A Hot One
by Raindrop Allen
Summary: Les, in a way you've never seen him before.


A Hot One  
  
By: Raindrop Allen, Slingshot, Trinity, and Firecracker  
  
Fire ran into the girls' bunkroom and threw off every unnecessary piece of clothing in a cheap attempt to keep cool. "Why does it hafta be so hot?" she asked, laying down in a cool spot under her bunk.  
  
"Fiah! Put some clothes back on! Ya don't need ta strip dat much!" Sling said.  
  
Fire peeked her head out from under the bunk and stuck her tongue out at Sling. "Shh! It's hot out!" she said. Les watched the group of newsies carefully and then snuck behind some crates. Trinity watched the others from her bottom bunk and laughed to herself. "Wow, Fire... that was a lovely show." Racetrack wandered around. The horses weren't running today. It was too hot. "HEY FIRE!" he yelled, headed for the girls' bunkroom. Fire shook her head. "Whaddya expect? It was real hot out!" Then she turned as saw Race, her face quickly turning bright red. "Don'tcha know how ta knock?" she shouted, rolling completely back under the bunk. Race stammered. "Uh so-r-----ry!" Les, still hiding behind the crates, quickly wiggled out of all his clothes. Grabbing a few licorice whips, then leaped out from behind the crates, and began running through the Lodging House, screaming at the top of his puny lungs. "Bare as the day I was born! Bare as the day I was born!" shrieked Les. Race headed to the hall only to see Les. "I'se dreamin', I gotta be!" Trinity's eyes grew wide as she saw Les. "What..." Slingshot covered her eyes. "LES!!" Mush was climbing the stairs when Les zoomed by him. "What da..." Fire was under the bunk so she didn't see anything. "Wha's goin' on?" she asked. "LES IS NAKED!" Sling yelled. "More so than you..." She quietly mumbled. Race passed Mush. "If ya want a real shockah, look at Fiah. " Les stopped in the center of the room and started to shimmy.  
  
"Umm... uhhh... yeah" Trinity pointed out the door.  
  
Blink was wandering aimlessly down the hallway when he encountered Les. "Ahhh! Now I'm blind in my otha eye!" he cried, covering his eye. Fire shuddered, "Ewwww liddle naked newsies, how nasty!"  
  
"Don't be tawkin' Fiah!" Sling replied. Fire rolled her eyes, "I got clothes on!"  
  
Les abruptly stopped shimmying and ran to the bathroom, where he grabbed a long roll of toilet paper and began dancing with it and wrapping it around everyone in the Lodging House. "Giddiup cowboy!" Les yelled, while running with the toilet paper and whipping his butt with a licorice whip. Trinity muffled her laughter and rolled on to her back cackling. Mush's eyebrows rose when he saw Fire's scantily clad body. Fire soon realized that Mush had entered the room and she soon grew very silent. "Uhhh.... ummmm....." she said. Race was actually standing behind Mush. "Why'd ya yell at me and not him!?" he demanded. Mush glared back at Race. "Oh stop!" He pushed past him and made his way to Fire's bunk. "Fiah...Mush is aftah ya..." Race said "What?" Fire asked, peeking her head out from under the bunk. Mush chuckled and continued to stroll towards Fire. "Lookin' good, theah, Fiah." "Uhh, thank ya, Mush," she said uneasily. Blink finally made his way into the bunkroom where everyone was. "What is dis, crazy day?" he asked as he sat down next to Trinity. Les's eyes lit up as he saw Blink sit down. He galloped over to him and leaped on Blink.  
  
"Bare as the day I was born!" he screamed  
  
"Tell me I'm seeing things, just tell me I'm seein' things!" Sling said, imitating Spot, when she saw Les.  
  
"GAH!" Blink screamed, "Get offa me! Trin', help me!"  
  
"Ack! Les!!!" Trinity grabbed onto Blink's sleeve and tugged on it. Les grinned when he saw Trinity, and immediately affixed himself to her arm. "You're cute," he exclaimed. "Aren't I? Bare as the day I was born!" "Ummmm uhhhh well ermmm lovely boit'day suit Les..." Blink latched onto Trinity's arm and refused to let go. "Someone help us!" he cried. Race, fed up, decided that he was the only true 'man' in the room, grabbed Les's arm and dragged him into the bathroom and tossed a large shirt in. Blink breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank ya, Race! Are ya okay, Trin'?" he asked, loosening his grip. Trinity wiped the tears from her eyes. "Yeah, I'se ok. That was umm lovely..." "Race! Race!" Les screamed. "Lemme out!!!" "Put dat on!" he said.  
  
"Put dat on!" mimicked Les. "You're jist jealous of me boithday suit!" Trinity burst out laughing and covered her reddening face in Blink's shirt. Blink chuckled. "If I don't see dat evah again, I'll die a happy man."  
  
"NO!" Race yelled back, not screamed, because 'men' don't scream.  
  
"Yes you are!" Les screamed. Race tied the door shut with Cowboy's rope. "I ain't lettin; ya out until ya put on dat shoit. It's big 'nough ta cover ya, heck, it's big 'nough ta covah me! So put it on!" Les's lip began to tremble, and big fat tears leaked down his face. "Dat aint nice, ya be meanie," he whimpered. "Yeah, well, who had ta watch ya awl t'rough da strike!? I ain't no meanie fer dat! Jus' put it on!" Race said. Les sobbed uncontrollably. "You big fat doo-doo head!" Race laughed. "I ain't big, dat's fer sure, and I ain't fat, cause I'se a newsie, so dat don't woik, Les." "You are too" Les cried, "I know dis stuff." "Are ya mockin' me accent! An' you don't know nothin'!" Race yelled. Mush, seeming not to have been phased by any of this, still stared at Fire.  
  
"How ya doin' taday, Fiah?" Fire wiped her forehead, "Hot, you?" she asked, fanning herself. Mush grinned at the site of Fire and gestured to the space next to her on the bunk. "Ya mind?" Fire shook her head, "Nah, not at awl. Make yerself at home.... if dat's possible on a bunk." Mush sat down next to Fire and inched closer. "T'anks." Trinity finally subdued and sighed. "Oh you guys..." Les leaped to the door and began pounding on the door, screaming hysterically at the top of his lungs. "HELP ME!!!! HE'S KILLING ME!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" Slingshot whistled to herself, trying to annoy Fire, who hated it when she whistled. Fire nodded. "Yer welcome," she replied cluelessly. She shot a look at Slingshot, "Whaddya think yer doin?" she asked, somewhat annoyed.  
  
"MUSH! I NEED SOME HELP WIT DIS KID!! BLINK! HELP!" Race yelled to the nearest 'men'. Blink scowled. "Do I hafta?"  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAHHH" Les screamed. Mush, who finally broke his gaze from Fire, shook his head. "What? Why? Was' 'e doin'?"  
  
"YES!!!!! DIS KID!" Race gave up, opened the door, and slammed Les against the wall. "You little..."Race grabbed the shirt and threw it over les, tying it on with Cowboy's rope. Les screamed and screamed and screamed. "RAPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Trinity stood up and stretched. She suddenly became aware of what Race was doing. " 'ey Race! C'mon..." Blink sighed loudly. "Race, don't kill da kid!"  
  
"Yeah!" Les echoed.  
  
"I ain't!" He yelled, slamming the bathroom door behind him  
  
"Are too" Les shouted. Trinity scowled at Blink who still hadn't helped and strode toward Race and Les. "Race yer hurtin' him!" Blink shook his head. "Davey's gonna have yer head on a stick if he sees dis!"  
  
"Ha!" Les retorted. "Davey LOVES my birthday suit!" "EWWWWWW!" Fire shouted, "Dat's a liddle too much information, yer warpin' my fragile liddle mind!" Fire covered her ears. Mush stood up but remained in the same spot watching. Race held up his hands. "FINE! LET HIM RUN AROUND NAKED! SEE IF I CARE!" He yelled, heading back to the bunkroom to sit on the roof.  
  
"Whee!" Les shouted, wiggling out of the shirt "Oh, Race!" Trinity let her voice trail off and gave up. Slingshot stormed up to the others. "RACE WAS JUST TRYIN' TA HELP! BUT YOU GUYS AND GOILS NEVAH LET HIM!" She headed up to the roof after Race. Blink reluctantly stood up and walked over to Les, "Les, will ya please put da shirt on? Yer scarin' 'em."  
  
"But...but..." Les whimpered, the tears beginning to come back. "I hate clothes." Blink sighed. "Well how about we compromise, jist put on a pair of pants, okay?" "PANTS!?!?!" Les exclaimed in horror. Blink nodded. "Yes, pants, dey'll keep da goils from screamin'." Mush frowned and turned back to the group. He sighed and planted himself back on the bed. Fire still lay curled up in a ball with her ears covered. "Must think happy thoughts. ..." Mush rubbed Fire's shoulder comfortingly while biting his lip. Race heard the commotion and grumbled to himself. "Dey nevah care. Watched da kid awl las' summah, did Davey even say t'anks? NO! Did Jack say t'anks fer keeping da kid away from me? NO! Did Blink and Mush say t'anks fer letting us go chase carriages and try and get Cowboy while you watch the rat? NO!" Les sadly walked to over to Race. "Gee Race," he said, "I'se real sorry. I didn't mean ta be so much trouble."  
  
"Well ya were! Ya scream yer head off again and da bulls'll be aftah me!" Race told Les. "D'ya forgive me," Les asked Race - pleadingly. Les cried.  
  
"NO! I'm sick of it! Ya worship Jack and Blink, and I'm da one dat watches ya! Awl ya do is tawk about Cowboy dis, Cowboy dat, while I TRY to make a livin'! So I ain't gonna forgive ya!" Fire slowly looked up and saw Mush, "It is safe now?" she asked, still keeping her ears covered. "Yeah, I t'ink so." Mush gave a reassuring smile to Fire. Fire breathed a sigh of relief and slowly uncovered her ears. "Good, I think dat scarred me for life." Trinity stood behind Blink and wrapped her arms around his waist. She rested her chin on his shoulder blade and whispered her thanks. Blink turned his head as far as he could and smiled at Trinity. "It was no problem, I did da best I could," he whispered back. Trinity smiled at his sweetness and rested her forehead against the back of his neck.  
  
"Do ya wanna go sit back down?" Blink asked Trinity, being careful not to hit her head with his. "But...but..." Les sniffed. He leaned over to Race, "Can I tell ya a secret?" "Ya told me lots, an' I always keep 'em. Why not?" Race grumbled. "Ok," Les said quietly. "Race, I wanna tell you dat you're really me favorite newsie," he said uncertainly, placing a finger in his mouth. "I ain't, don't lie, didn't your faddah tell ya not ta lie?" Race grumbled again. "In fact," Les said, leaning closer, "WET WILLIE!!!!!!!" he screamed, shoving his wet finger in Race's ear. Race finally gave up yelling and screamed at the kid. "If I evah catch ya I'll-" he stopped so that passersby wouldn't hear. Les ran helter-skelter across the room, running into various people. "AAAAAAAAAHHH"!!!! "Well, I t'ink Race's gonna rip Les' head off now." Mush said, shrugging. Fire giggled. "Dis should be interestin'." "Yeah..." Just then Trinity's eyes grew wide at the sight of Race and Les. She dove onto her bunk. Blink dove out of the way just in time, no sooner had her moved than they came barreling through. Race dove, landing on top of Les.  
  
"Hey!" Les yelled at Race, "You're getting a liddle fresh der don'tch think?!!?!?" "Whew, dat was close," Blink commented, looking up at Trinity.  
  
"Look, I ain't askin' fer much, jus' leave me alone! Go follow Cowboy like ya always tawk about!" Race stood up, kicked Les in the stomach, and stormed off.  
  
"Aaaaaagh!" Les groaned.  
  
"Oh my God... didja see dat Blink?" Trinity's mouth gaped wide. Blink nodded. "Yeah, sadly, I did."  
  
"I never did nuthing ta you!" Les shouted Race turned. "That's the point! Ya nevah even said heya or carryin' da bannah ta me! I watch ya every day, and ya just tawk about Cowboy! I ain't doing it no more!"  
  
"HEYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1" Les howled. "HEYA HEYA HEYA HEYA HEYA HEYA HEYA HEYA HEYA HEYA!" "It doesn't mattah no moah Les." Race said surprisingly calmly, walking further away. Mush looked towards where the commotion was and gestured for Fire. "What?" Fire asked as she looked at where Mush was pointing. "Look," Mush said. "Are ya payin' attention?" Fire shook her head. "N-no," she replied because in fact she wasn't paying attention, she was busy being self-conscious. Mush blinked then scowled at Fire. He looked her up and down but surprisingly broke his stare and looked back at the action. Fire sighed loudly. "I should pro'ly get more clothes on," she thought to herself before standing back up and heading towards the washroom. Les paused a moment and glances around the room. "Did ya'll know dat Jack picks his nose?"  
  
"Jack said not ta say dat Les!" Race turned, horrified.  
  
"Dat's how he's so tall!" Les shouted. "He EATS 'em!!!" Trinity inched towards Blink in fright and a place to hide. Blink slipped his arm around Trinity's shoulder. "It's gonna be okay," he whispered. Trinity smiled thankfully and inched toward him. "I saw 'im do it!" Les yelled. Race scowled. "He'll kill ya if 'e find out ya said dat!"  
  
"Aw..Race" Les said affectionately, "I know dat you'll protect me like always." Racetrack narrowed his eyes. "But he won't get a chance to kill ya, will he?" He said quietly, heading back to Les. Les gasped. "Oh no! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHH!" Les screamed. Race grinned. "That's right Les. You're MINUTES are numbered." Les ran around Race quickly and leapt upon his back, with an iron grip. Then he began licking Race's ears. "Take that!" he squeaked.  
  
"ASK! YOU SNOT NOSED BRAT GET OFFA ME!" Race yelled, backing into a wall to hurt Les.  
  
"You guys done?" Trinity said beginning to become bore d with Race's attitude. Blink shook his head. "Race just wants ta play big hero," he whispered to Trinity.  
  
"I HEARD DAT BLINK!"  
  
"Oh" Trinity stood and grabbed Blinks hand. She led him out of the room and downstairs to the lobby.  
  
"Where are we goin'?" Blink asked as they headed down the stairs. Trinity glared back at Race. "Away from Race and his meanness!"  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGHH," Les gasped. "SAVE ME SOMEONE!" "COWBOY AIN'T HEAH TA SAVE YOU!" Race yelled at Les. Race backed into another wall, hitting it harder. Les grinned evilly, squeezing tighter and tighter to Race's neck, until he began turning VERY purple. Race started gasping for air, and out sizing the little monster, he got an idea, and dropped to the floor, landing on Les. Les began to turn purple himself, unable to breath with that big fat Race on him.  
  
"Ah ha!" he barely managed to squeak, "I'll have revenge yet!" "NO YOU WON'T! NOT UNLESS YOU U BECOME A GHOST!" Race said, standing free of Les. Race stood with his foot on Les's stomach. "I'LL FINALLY BE RID OF YOU!" he yelled. Blink re-entered the bunkroom, "I'm back, didja miss me?"  
  
"NO! WE DIDN'T!" Race yelled at Blink, putting little by little his weight on Les. Blink shook his head. "Whatevah," he said, plopping down on a bunk. Fire ran back into the bunkroom. "I changed my mind," she said to whoever cared as she laid back down on her bunk. Les gulped for air. Suddenly, a pool of something warm and wet appeared under the two newsies... Les aimed at Race and zapped him in the eyes. "HA!"  
  
"YOU LITTLE!!!" Race yelled, stepping on Les and heading to the washroom. Les giggled hysterically, and then ran and hide under a bed. Race hurriedly washed up, changed into a clean vest, and in about 3 minutes was back into the bunkroom. "WHERE IS HE?!" Race yelled. He heard some giggling and almost looked under the bed, but remembered he just cleaned up. Les grinned wickedly. Race jumped on top of a bunk. Les stopped breathing, almost. Race looked around. "Fiah, do you happ'n ta have, oh, say, a knife?" Race said, smiling politely. Les's eyes widened. Race kept smiling. Les's eyes got wider. Fire thought for a minute. "Why, yes, I do," she said, pulling a knife out from under her pillow. Les gulped silently.  
  
"May I borrow it for a moment?" Race asked using his best manners. He kept smiling. Fire handed the knife to Race. "A coise, jist wash it when yer done." Les began to cry.  
  
"Okay, t'anks, FC!" Fire shrugged. "It was no problem." Race heard the mumbled crying and almost felt guilty. Then he remembered all those times he had to chase Les around NYC trying to get him back to the Jacobs. "Well," Les thought to himself, "At least I get to die naked. And naked is great," Les continued thinking. "Maybe I can make a big mess and Race will have to clean it all up." Racetrack grinned wickedly. "Les, did I evah tell you, oh, that my family is mostly in the Italian Ma? Les, do you know what the Mafia is?" Race asked nicely. Race waited for a reply then grinned.  
  
"Huh uh" Les said, and then clapped his hands over his mouth. "Oops."  
  
"What is it, Les?"  
  
"Um.." Les thought.. "Ice cream? Turtles? Pigs?"  
  
"Nah Les, guess again."  
  
"A distinct lack of clothes? Toilets? Horses? Santa Fe?"  
  
"Very funny. Do ya want me to tell ya Les?"  
  
"I'm not sure."  
  
"Well, I'll tell ya then."  
  
"Um...ok..."  
  
"It's a group of Italians, like me, that go around killing people. They get paid for it. At least in Italy they do." Les gasped. "I was really hoping for ice cream," he said.  
  
"Butcha know what the best part is?"  
  
"Best part?" Les asked. "Is there ice cream?"  
  
"The best part is they NEVAH feel guilty."  
  
"Well shoot," Les said. "Wait!" he exclaimed! "I mean 'darn'! Don't SHOOT me!!! Fire giggled. "Dis should be fun."  
  
"Sometimes, if dey feel nice, dey'll give deir victims a final meal. But you know what Les?"  
  
"No ice cream?" Les guessed.  
  
"I ain't feelin' nice right now."  
  
"Bummer." Les said. "You're a meanie-butt." Race shook trying to control his anger. "That's what all a da mafia is, Les."  
  
"Does everyone in the mafia have a big meanie-butt like you," Les asked. Race clenched his teeth. "Yes Les, dey's awl mean."  
  
"But are their butts BIG?" Les asked. "Like yours?" Race ground his teeth. "Mine ain't big. Awl my life everyone's been tellin' me I'se small an' scrawny. Well, dey won't no moah."  
  
"I think you're pretty fat," Les said. "I wouldn't say so, would you Fiah?" Race kept edging towards Les.  
  
"Eep!" Fire shook her head. "I wouldn't say dat eitha, 'specially when yer tawkin' to a mobster wit' a knife....... a sharp an' shiny knife," she said.  
  
"T'ank ya Fiah." Fire nodded. "It was no problem."  
  
"But he's gonna kill me anyway!" Les exclaimed. Fire cackled. "Dat's da whole point, Les."  
  
"This sucks." Les said.  
  
"Fiah gets it, why can't you Les?" Race said. "Maybe because he's stupid?" Fire asked.  
  
"I'm kinda dumb," Les said. "I hang around you too much." Fire shot Les the 'Oh NO you did NOT just say that' look. "Race ain't stupid." Les giggled. "Well, eiddah way," Race managed to get through his clenched teeth, "Unless Cowboy or Davey come walkin t'rough dat door I'se killin' ya." Fire looked at Les with a confused look on her face. "Since when do boys giggle?" Race looked at Fire. "I'd question if he was a boy, but 'e's naked." Fire giggled. "Ewww, dat's nasty." "I'm a naked little twerp, Fire," Les commented. "What d'ya expect?" Fire glared at Les. "Oh no, now yer gonna get it!" she shouted as she grabbed a broomstick and tried to beat Les down with it. "FC! Leave him to me!" Race turned to Les. "So, Les, slow and painful, y'know, bit by bit, or fast and, well, I could slit yer throat."  
  
"Bit by bit!" Les said. Race smiled again. "Are ya sure?" "Yeah!" Fire pouted. "But....but...."  
  
"FC, if ya like, you can help cut him up, or ya can hold him or somet'in'." Fire's eyes sparkled with the idea of cutting Les up into little newsie strips. "Can I??" "Yeah, you can help, FC."  
  
"Well, Les, wheah would ya like me ta start?"  
  
"The toes"!  
  
"Ok, Les!" With a swift move Les wasn't under the bed anymore, he was in the middle of the floor. Les gasped. Race took the knife from his pocket and examined it. "Nice and sharp." Fire smiled evilly. "Yay! I get ta help make liddle newsie strips!" Les sighed.  
  
"Yes Fiah, ya do. Get a blanket please." Fire skipped over to her bunk and got a blanket. "Heah ya go," she said, handing it to Race. Race took it and ripped in two. He tied Les's arms together, and covered the groin/stomach area. "Couldn't look at dat no moah." Fire shook her head. "Me eitha, dat was nasty." Race grinned and knelt at Les's legs and, ripping some more rope, tied them together.  
  
"Ok Les, ya ready?"  
  
"Yes." Fire rubbed her hands together evilly. "Heah we go." Race took out the knife, and lined it up with Les's smallest right toe. With a swift move he cut it off. Les gasped and giggled. "Look! There's less of Les!" Fire shuddered. "Ewwww, dat was nasty..... do it again!"  
  
"Yeah!"  
  
"Awright." Race cut of each toe, one by one.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHH!" Les screamed. Race then handed the knife to FC. "Heah, cut off half a foot."  
  
"Whoa," Les whispered. Fire gladly took the knife. "Thank ya, Race," she said as she lined up the knife with his foot and cut off the bottom half.  
  
"Eep!" Les exclaimed. Race smiled. "Now do da uddah."  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHGHGHG !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
"Okay!" Fire yelled as she cut off the bottom half of his other foot.  
  
"FC, can ya handle it?" Fire smirked. "Ohhhh yeah." "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHGHGHGHG H!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "Now cut of what's left of the foot." More screams.  
  
"Les, shaddup, you requested it dis way."  
  
"Oh yeah.." Fire cackled before cutting off the rest of Les's foot. "Dis is fun!"  
  
"Ok, my toin again FC."  
  
"Oh man," Les said.  
  
"Okay," Fire replied as she handed Race the knife. Race took the knife and cut a deep cut down Les's leg, just a gash , not a cut.  
  
"This would be better with ice cream."  
  
"It ain't s'pposed ta be good, Les."  
  
"I didn't say it would be good...just...better." Racetrack gashed the other leg. More screams.  
  
"It ain't s'pposed ta be bettah. If it hoits real bad, I can just slit yer t'roat." "Yeah, can we do dat?" Fire asked.  
  
"No..that wouldn't be fun at all," Les said. Race shrugged and used the knife to peel back the skin on Les's leg where he had gashed it. "We do what da kid says."  
  
"Let me go!" Les cried.  
  
"But we can't let 'im go, he'll tell on us." Fire objected.  
  
"No I won't!" "Shoah...." Race laughed. "If I letcha go, ya can't get anywhere. We kill ya. You only have say on how we kill ya"  
  
"With ice cream!" Les cried. Race made another gash in the leg and peeled back the skin with the knife. Then, lucky that the knife cut through bones, he cut of the kneecap. More, louder, screams. Fire cackled. "Whoo! Dis is fun!" Race did the same on the other leg.  
  
"Whoo!" "Yeah!" Race glared at Les. "What?!"  
  
"FC, heah's da deal. He ain't gonna live much longah. I need ya ta find somethin' ta put dis stuff in." Fire thought for a minute. "Like a big brown bag we can boin?" "Cool!" Les chirped. "Eiddah dat, or you can deal wit' cuttin' up da next section of 'im, but dat goes to his waist."  
  
"If dat has to do wit' da male part, I'll jist go an' get da bag."  
  
"Yeah, and find some flood cleaner stuff. Luckily I put down papeahs..."  
  
"Whew!" Les wiggled a bit and cheered.  
  
"Den get da bag."  
  
"Okay." Fire set off to find the floor cleaner and a bag.  
  
"Les yer almost legless, what're ya cheerin' bout?" Race asked.  
  
"I dunno..." Les sniffed. "Man, don't be such a party pooper!" Race got the knife and began, layer then layer, slicing off his upper leg's skin. "OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! " Momentarily, Fire returned with the floor cleaner and a few bags. "I got da stuff!"  
  
"GO FC! I nevah t'ought ya'd find 'em so fast!" Race said.  
  
"T'anks. Luckily I knew where good ol' Kloppman keeps dis stuff." Race looked satisfied with the skin peeling, took note of where Les's belly button was, and, well, enlarged it. Screams.  
  
"FC, I t'ink ya should join da mafia wit me." Race told her, ignoring Les. More screams. Fire beamed. "Ya think so? I would like dat...... but I ain't Italian."  
  
"Dat's ok, when dey's dis good we don't give a darn if dey's Italian or not."  
  
"Well den you can count me in." Race looked at FC. "Ya may want ta toin around, I gotta take dis blanket of 'im now."  
  
"Good idea, I don't wanna see that," Fire said as she turned around. Louder screams. Race removed the blanket, and started cutting criss- crossed on that section of Les. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" Les screamed. When the lines made little squares, he pulled them out one by one. "Les, I can still jus' slit your t'roat," Race threatened.  
  
"Oops. Sorry."  
  
"Was dat a yes or no?"  
  
"No." Race shrugged. "Ok." Fire shook her head. "Dis kid is nutty if he likes bein' cut up so much."  
  
"Pro'ly a self mutilator den."  
  
"Whoo!" Les cheered.  
  
"Pro'ly, he's also crazy ta like runnin' around naked." Weaker screams. Race cut off everything that FC wouldn't want to see. Actually wincing. "FC, ya couldn't imagine how much dis would hoit." Fire shook her head. "I wouldn't wanna know!"  
  
"What ya didn't wanna see is gone, by the way." Les sobbed. "Not my manhood!"  
  
"Les, ya were nevah a man!" Race said.  
  
"Darn."  
  
"Good, so I can toin back around now?" Fire asked.  
  
"Yeah, but it's sorta bloody. If ya can't handle dis ya can't be in da mafia." Les sighed.  
  
"I can handle it," she said, turning back around.  
  
"Les, I've nevah known nobody to live as long as you have," Race commented.  
  
"I'm really brave."  
  
"Yeah, you would think dat aftah dis he'd go inta shock already," Fire said.  
  
"FC, ya wanna take da next section? It involves prying up da ribs."  
  
"Ohhh ribs, sounds like fun!" Les began to shake. "Bare as the day I was born!" he gasped over and over.  
  
"Les, are ya FINALLY dyin'?" Race said, irritated.  
  
"Sort of"  
  
"Sorta? How is dat possible?" Fire took the knife from Race and started to pry of Les's ribs. "Ohh, dis is fun."  
  
"Cause, like, I kinda am having trouble breathing...but I can still talk," Les explained.  
  
"Oh right. FC, he's dead as soon as you puncture does lungs."  
  
"Shouldn't have mentioned that..." Les groaned. "Can I puncture dem now?"  
  
"Go ahead. "  
  
"YAY!" Fire cried as she dug around for Les's lungs. "Heah dey are," she said as she stabbed one.  
  
"Just stab in between two ribs!"  
  
"Okay" she replied as she stabbed in between two ribs. Les gagged and slowly stopped shaking. Then Les gagged and stopped breathing.  
  
"Goodbye Les!" Race said.  
  
"Good...bye..." he whispered.  
  
"I killed 'im. I killed Les. Les went bye-bye," Fire said.  
  
"Don't feel guilty, FC."  
  
"I don't!"  
  
"He desoived it." Race said, starting to throw pieces of flesh in the bags. "Start cleanin' up da floor, please."  
  
"Okay," Fire said as she grabbed the floor cleaner. Race looked pleased as he put the bags on the fire escape and threw a few matches in. The burned to a crisp, with only ashes left.  
  
"Bye ya little rat!" Race said to the ashes blowing away. Fire carefully mopped up the floor, making sure that she didn't leave any blood or Les pieces behind.  
  
"Done, FC?" Fire nodded. "Yep, da floor's awl clean."  
  
"Good, ready to join da Italian Mafia now?"  
  
"Yeah, I am so ready."  
  
"Good bye!!!!" called a said echo of Les' voice. 


End file.
